Healthy Leaders Act Like their True Self with Joy
Are you ever tempted to abandon your true self?
Last week I introduced you that you will be your best self when you remain relational in the face of tension and negative emotions; when you keep the relationship more important than the problem. We are often hi-jacked by our emotions and can find ourselves just wanting the problem to go away, including the person on the other end. Have you ever felt like that? You set aside curiosity, appreciation, and kindness because you needed to prove yourself and couldn’t handle the stress. Defensiveness is often the posture taken in this moment.
I am giving you these tools so that you and I can seek to become a RARE Leader. The first R stands for Remain Relational, which I just spoke of above. The A in Rare, stands for Act Like Yourself.
In the face of tension, disagreements, even perceived disagreements, many of us are tempted to put on a mask and become more like the person we are trying to seek approval from. You may be well aware if you are someone who is a “people-pleaser” and have tried to set boundaries and even ask the question: “Lord what is mine to do today?”
However, I’m going to take a different direction. I want to introduce you to the idea that when we are living from a place of JOY we are acting like our true selves.
Have you ever noticed the different in you when you are living from a place of joy verses when you’ve lost it? Have you noticed your engagement levels change? Maybe you seem more disconnected from people and conversation?
I am constantly surrounded by students every day as a High School teacher. I have good days and bad days; joyful days and not too joyful. I have one student in particular that has a joy-radar; and she can tell when I’m off my game! I sometimes find myself irritated when she asks me if I’m really having a good day, because sometimes I don’t want to admit that I’m having an off-day.
So what’s happening when I’ve lost my joy? My relational receptors are OFF and not firing. I’m not my best self.
You are your best self when your relational receptors are on, which is a byproduct of joy. And not to mention that our strength is measured by the capacity of our joy. More joy = more strength.
TIP AND TWEAK:
🔥This week be conscious of your joy-level and how it’s effecting your engagement with others.
🔥I wholeheartedly believe that joy is a relational byproduct… we receive joy from the Lord and that joy is made complete in our fellowship with one another.
🔥Joy in its horizontal/relational form is being able to say “I am glad to be with you right here and right now - a completeness of joy from the Lord.”
🔥We often need to fight for joy. Sometimes it can be impossible to just choose it.
TOOLS:
⚒ One tool I want to introduce you to is called TAPPING. It’s more scientific than theological, but I love tying the two together.
⚒ Here is a video I have found on TAPPING and how to do it (it is based off of pressure points used in acupuncture and I’ve used this in my classroom and personally). What does it do? It turns on our relational receptors.
“How to Tap with Jessica Ortner”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPqGjcxoPS8
⚒ What I do is repeat a truth about me that the Lord might say over me, such as: “I am a child of God.” Or “I am loved and accepted unconditionally.” Or “The joy of the Lord is my strength.” I will say truths like this while I tap on the appropriate pressure points.
⚒ When do I do this? Before I teach, before a meeting, before I get home from work for the day, or any other time that I am tired or experiencing a negative emotion and am entering into a relational component of my day.
Try these tips this week and see if it makes a difference!
Cheers to a healthier week!
- Jason